wayward wormhole

The Wayward Wormhole is now thirty-one days away. Aside from my heart palpitations, a
stomach that flips with butterflies every time someone brings up how soon we’ll be at the
Painted Pony Ranch, preparations are well underway, things are going well, and barring any
unforeseen roadblocks, the to-do list is manageable.

With that being said, this month I want to talk about the things I’m excited about. First, there’s
the work and who’s going to see it. Arley Sorg reading my short story and giving feedback?
Delectable! Conversations with Minister Faust about story and writing and philosophy?
Fantastic! Ten days with Donald Maass and Charlie Finlay knowing they’ve both read my novel
and want to help me move it toward publication? The German language probably has a word
that encompasses the torrent of emotion swirling throughout my body. There goes my stomach
again.

Second is the company. I’ve always felt out of place in groups. They don’t get my jokes, they
don’t love the same movies or TV shows, they don’t care about science or dragons or ravens,
and they certainly don’t discuss inter-species dino sex. Then I went to the Surrey International
Writers Conference in BC Canada, and discovered that even if I was the weird one, there were
many, many more people like me—they just weren’t in Campbell River (except for my best
friend—she’s weird in the best ways). So, step one: conferences are good. Then I went to the
Wayward Wormhole last year and discovered how fantastic it is to live with a bunch of nut-ball
crazy SF&F writers who were as obsessed with story as I am. Spending time with all of you is
the highlight of my year, and is the driving force behind every year’s location, instructor
selections, and format.

I’m also really looking forward to a change of pace, a bit of peace at the end of a tumultuous
year. My mum is eighty-two now and struggling with her memory and how she navigates
through this overly complex world. She and I have been investigating seniors’ homes, and it’s
hard watching her come to terms with her situation and its ultimate conclusion. There are some
good things happening too. My husband, Geoff and I have bought a condo in Victoria and gain
possession two days after we return from the Wormhole. Needless to say, I’ve been busy, and I
keep moving forward by imagining myself floating in the pool or talking some quiet time in the
desert. On the flip side, I also enjoy drinking and playing pool, and there’s a foosball table, but
I’m not sure my wrists can hold up under the strain of slamming that little ball down the
opponent’s…sorry…I can get competitive.

The Wormhole holds an entire world inside its writing bubble. It’s my happy place where my
people meet, where laughter and angst live in the same space, and I hope it’s all that and more
for you, too.

The Rambo Academy for Wayward Writers is pleased to announce the second annual Wayward Wormhole, this time in New Mexico. Join us for the short story workshop to study with Arley Sorg and Minister Faust, or the novel workshop with Donald Maass, C.C. Finlay, and Cat Rambo.

Both intensive workshops will be hosted at the Painted Pony ranch in Rodeo, New Mexico. The short story workshop runs November 4-12, 2024, and the novel workshop runs November 15 through 24, 2024.

The Rambo Academy for Wayward Writers has been in existence for thirteen years, serving hundreds of students who have gone on to win awards, honors, and accolades, including Nebula, Hugo, and World Fantasy Awards. “I attended Clarion West, and have taught at multiple workshops now,” says Academy founder Cat Rambo. “While others have delivered the gold standard, I decided to stretch to the platinum level and deliver amazing workshops in equally amazing settings. Last year’s was a castle in Spain, this year a fabulous location in southwestern America. And wait till you hear what we’ve got cooked up for 2025!”

More details about these exciting workshops and how to apply!

Janet writes again:

There’s only one thing more exciting than writing in a 10th-century castle, and that’s spending quality time””in person””with exceptional writing instructors. If you’re one of the lucky people who has taken classes with Cat Rambo, Ann Leckie, Sarah Pinsker, or Tobias Buckell, you know I’m not exaggerating when I say these kind, brilliant people have dug into the prose-psyche and discovered truths about communication that can change how I write with a single sentence.

At the castle, they’ll discuss beginnings and endings, setting, character, and conflict. If you’re like me, you’ve taken numerous classes about these fundamental topics, but in the hands of these master crafters, each is elevated to that special something publishers seek from today’s writers.

Have you ever wondered where Sarah Pinsker came up with an idea for one of her popular short stories? She’ll lead a short story discussion group one night after dinner. What niche topic is important to Tobias Buckell? He’ll give a talk during his spare day. What’s Ann Leckie reading, and how did those books catch her interest? How does promoting others lead to a successful writing career? Cat Rambo knows the answer.

What I want most from my time in the castle is to hear their stories. They’ve all worked incredibly hard to get where they are today. Nothing came easy, yet they didn’t give up writing. They’re all serious yet friendly, dedicated yet generous with their knowledge. I want to be like them when I grow up.

The latest dispatch from Janet:

This is the Castell de Llaes courtyard. The building on the right is the entrance area I wrote about a few weeks back, and the main castle is straight ahead, with the cemetery past the entrance, but also on the right.

The courtyard is walled in by 10th-century blocks of stone and surrounded by trees, shrubs, and flowers that grow along the hilltop’s edge. At night it’s going to be pitch-fricken-black out there! I can’t wait to see the stars from this amazing dark-spot. My travel telescope should fit into my suitcase””if you see me wearing the same clothes over and over, you’ll know I made a difficult choice when packing.

And yes, it’s nice during the day, too. You can expect daily temperatures around 66F or 19C, with lows down to 44F or 7C at night. Now, I’m Canadian, so this means a light sweater in the evening, but whatever it means to you, day or night, I think spending time in this protected courtyard may be a highlight of the trip. There are private benches along the outer edge, a large, long-table for meals or drinks, and several shady tree spots for notes, story-catching, or plain old zoning out.

Cat and I are planning several BBQ nights, so bring your appetite.

THE APPLICATION WINDOW ENDS ON MAY 31 AT MIDNIGHT EST ““ THAT’S IN 15 DAYS!!

Our latest dispatch from Janet:

I’ve never written in a cemetery, but I’m drawn to the idea, especially after reading Neil Gaiman’s “The Graveyard Book.” So why haven’t I done it?

I admit I’m a bit intimidated to write amongst the dead. Even walking through a graveyard in the daytime calls up the imagined lives of the buried and their surviving families (even if those families passed on centuries ago).

Are there stories there? Sure. Are there distractions? Absolutely. Still, I imagine sitting in the shade with my notebook, absorbing the peace broken only by the chirrup of small birds and the far-off drone of a lawnmower. At least, I thought that scene was peaceful, until some scientist revealed that the lovely fresh-cut grass smell resulted from millions of grass blades screaming in agony as a thresher whacked them down to size.

This cemetery seems peaceful, though.

I’m going to write there.

Maybe one of the residents will tell me their story.

PS. Don’t be surprised by the bones you see poking from the cliff next to this graveyard. That’s where cannonballs hit the castle during the Revolt of Catalonia from 1640 to 1652. Attackers destroyed a small section of the castle along with the original cemetery. Unfortunately, any excavation work could undermine the castle’s foundation, so recovery and reburial is not easy.

ONLY ONE MORE DAY FOR THE OPEN EARLY BIRD SUBMISSION!

An update from Janet, who has been working away at answering questions.

The Wayward Wormhole just made getting to the castle a (w)hole lot easier by meeting you at the airport! Cat and I will head to Barcelona Airport and wait for your flight. We’ll both help with luggage and get you to the shuttle that takes us to the train station. I’ll make the trip to Vic with you and then drive you to the castle. Cat Rambo will stay at the airport, greet the next group of students, and escort them to Vic, where I’ll be waiting to drive back to the castle.

Why would we do this?

1. You are important to us plus the trip is long and generally annoying””we can help make it easier.

2. Your visit will cover a minimum of twenty-two days. That’s a lot of underwear. Yes, the castle has two washing machines, but you’ll want a few changes of clothes and other stuff, so you’ll most likely travel with more than a carry-on bag. We can help with that.

3. Traveling with someone familiar with the trip reduces anxiety, and who doesn’t need a little less anxiety these days?

Do you need to get to the castle this way? No.

Will we provide detailed instructions if you want to travel on your own? Of course, we will.

What does the trip from the airport to the castle entail? To travel the 75 miles (121 km) you’ll need to do the following:

– Take the shuttle bus from the main airport to Terminal B. They travel back and forth constantly.

31 minutes.

– Terminal B has a large train station. A train to Vic leaves every ten min. or so from 4:20 am to 10 pm. By a ticket (approx. 14 euros), catch a train.

1 h 20 minutes.

– At Vic, a car will meet you at the train station and drive you to the castle. 45 minutes.

It’s a long day, so we hope you arrive a day or two early and rest up before Sarah Pinsker gets a hold of you on November 1st.

Got any questions? Email me at janetwaywardwormhole@gmail.com

PUBLIC EARLY BIRD ENDS SOON!

Addendum from Cat: When Janet suggested this, I immediately agreed. I’m happy to be there to greet people. There’s a great little cafe there and I plan to bring a notebook and enjoy a bocadilla and some coffee while hanging out. The airport is mid-sized, and well-marked. I’ll have my cellphone handy should you need to ping me for guidance. The train ride is pretty easy and pleasant – so much to look at!

Here’s another moment from Janet:

A month in a castle in Spain sounds lovely. But add the idea of talking and being around fifteen other people 24/7. It’s enough to make the more introverted reconsider their need to write in a castle””if””it weren’t for the multitude of balconies, cubby holes, and garden (or graveyard) spaces where one can go to read or write in private. Writers need time to think. So on our preview of Castell de Llaés, we looked for those special places where a person could reflect and recharge.

You can find a quiet place inside or outside at castle level or discover the perfect balcony that balances both. Every side of the castle offers views to satisfy every mood and the tranquility to mellow even the most angst-ridden muse. Being from British Columbia, I like seeing the Pyrenees mountains, and I can’t help but imagine the people who marched from France and attacked Castell de Llaés in 1635.

Below the castle, there’s ground cover and grasses, perfect for tucking in with a good book or capturing one of the stories that swirl through the air above us.

Join us and stake out your own private nook.

Bedrooms. That quiet, cozy sanctuary where all things heavy can be folded away, tucked into a corner and laid down for a while. My quiet time is important to me. I work alone 90 percent of the time and find it hard to talk to others without taking breaks.

When I saw the size and comfort of the bedrooms at Castell de Llaes, I was not only charmed, but tremendously relieved. They’re as big as any standard hotel room, yet built with stone blocks carved back in 998 AD. Here’s four of the eight rooms. The owners have moved the two beds close together, but there’s lot of room to move them apart.

There is at least one outlet in every room, so you can charge your phones and computers, as well as use any medical devices, such as a CPAP machine. Linens are changed weekly.

Plus, every room has stunning views of the Spanish countryside.

Since we’re reaching the end of the Patreon Early Bird submission, I want to address one other concern I’ve heard from applicants. Bathrooms.

There are four full bathrooms at the Castle. Two in the tower, and two in the main area. They are modern, with a shower, toilet, and bidet. Bathrooms are thoroughly cleaned weekly, or as needed. We hope to see you there!

Check out http://www.kittywumpus.net/blog/how-to-apply-for-the-wayward-wormhole-regular-and-virtual-versions/ for more information.

Up a set of rugged stone steps, the doors of the castle opened and we entered. I’d been awed by its structure, by its historical significance, and its position in the Catalonia countryside. Now I was nervous. So much could go wrong in the next half hour. We had criteria regarding comfort, workspaces, relaxation areas, kitchens, and modern plumbing. After all, sixteen people living for three weeks in a drafty castle with tiny rooms and narrow hallways could end up being memorable for all the wrong reasons.

Plus, we wanted a private lounge for Ann Leckie, Tobias Buckell, Sarah Pinsker, and Cat Rambo, along with intimate indoor and outdoor spaces for students to read, chat, and think. Could the reality inside this 10th century castle possibly meet our needs? Our lifelong dream of writing in a castle depended on it.

With a mind set on problem-solving, I passed through my first ever castle doors and found myself in a spacious semi-furnished room with a storage area off to one side. My list covered a lot of rooms, a check for onsite supplies, and other areas requiring scrutiny. The entrance room wasn’t on the list, but it had a good air about it and my nerves dropped to a manageable level. With that, I grew confident that this experience was about to get awesome.

Information about the Wayward Wormhole Intensive Writing Workshop

There’s a stillness atop Sant Bartomeu hill that settles my bones and calms my brain. At 998 meters above sea level, I lean against a centuries-old stone wall, part of the Castell de Llaés, and look across the fields below. Thirty-nine km to the right is a second hill of 1025 meters, where I can see remains of the castle of Besora as it sits alone with its past. In the other direction, at 961 meters, sits the medieval remains of Castell de Milany. With the slightest effort, I lower a cellophane sheet over the scene and add people in tunics walking with horses wearing baroque saddles. A second overlay adds dusk and wispy tendrils of cloud to the picture. Torches flare along the castle walls to both sides of me, and the glow of a central fire, ready to send messages across the gap between them as night descends. -Janet K. Smith